How Losing A Pregnancy Changed My Easter This Year

by Heather on March 28, 2016

"How Losing A Pregnancy Changed My Easter This Year" by Heather of happyfitnavywife.com | Touching story, I can relate!

How Losing A Pregnancy Changed My Easter This Year

This Easter morning I found myself tearing up in church. Memories from last Easter came rushing back, surprising me with emotion.

Last year on the night before Easter, we found ourselves in the ER learning that we had lost our pregnancy at 11 weeks. The next day, we mustered the energy to go to church and celebrate Easter, making an effort to remember God’s hope and bring joy to our young daughter despite our pain.

This year I found myself in the same room, singing similar songs of “O death where is your sting?” We were sitting in almost the exact same location as we had been last year. I remembered vividly the pain, the heartache, being thankful the room was dark so others wouldn’t see my tears. A year ago I felt the pain of death. It was too raw.

The months between then and now have been challenging in many ways. We moved to a new home here in Virginia which was stressful, but overall a positive change. We found out in the spring that I had a blood clotting disorder that may have been contributing to our miscarriages. We took a break from fertility treatments for a while, then started them up in the fall. Over the holidays, we had some traumatic family issues come up, and I had two of my closest friends lose parents to cancer.

Life just doesn’t stop moving. Good things happen simultaneously with bad. It’s often all one big pot of emotions and experiences, and trying to sort them out can be difficult. It has been for me. One day I’m elated and the next, devastated by the newest update on fertility, family, friends… whatever it may be.

This morning I remembered our loss from a year ago. The tears peeked through my blinks. I remembered that sweet life that never made it to our world.

Losing a pregnancy

But this year I had tears for another reason. Tears of joy and a heart full of gratitude, because this Easter I am 16 weeks pregnant!

I’ve felt the baby kicking and fluttering around in my tummy. Our daughter can’t wait to be a big sister. We almost just can’t believe it.

This Easter morning I found myself tearing up in church because Christ has conquered death once and for all. Even though death is painful, it’s not final. And I tearfully rejoice that we have been given the precious gift of life where once there was loss. This new life doesn’t erase that loss, but it brings new hope and joy!

Happy Easter from our family to yours!

xoxo,
Heather

losing a pregnancy

My bump and I getting ready to tackle some garage organization aka “nesting” =)

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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Julie Hess March 29, 2016 at 7:58 pm

Heather- congratulations! Thanks for sharing this story. I believe I had the same blood clotting disorder (MTHFR?) and similar problem. But I truly believe we have to go thru the sorrow to appreciate the sweet. Thrilled for your family and new angel.

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2 Heather April 5, 2016 at 10:01 am

Thank you so much Julie! I have the anti-cardiolipen antibody but I really don’t know too much about it, but sounds like many similar things lead to similar results. =( I agree, I might not appreciate children the way I do now had we not gone through this! Hope all is well at your new duty station!

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3 Shannon March 30, 2016 at 4:05 pm

Heather,

I am so happy that you were able to celebrate the new life within you this Easter! I rejoice with you, friend! I know all-too-well that pregnancy after miscarriage doesn’t erase the pain of the loss — but it does help the healing process, and certainly heightens feelings of joy and gratitude for new life. I’ll continue to pray for you and your precious little one!

Praise God that He conquered death through His precious Son!

Blessings,
Shannon

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4 Heather April 5, 2016 at 9:59 am

Thank you so much Shannon! I so appreciate you walking alongside me in this! hugs, Heather

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