These 8 Secrets About Navy Wife Life Will Inspire You

by Heather on September 25, 2013

"These 8 Secrets About Navy Wife Life Will Inspire You" by Heather of | Love this!

I awoke early in the morning with the most dreaded thought:

Today is the day we say goodbye.

Our daughter was two weeks old. My husband kissed her in her crib and slipped out of her room.

My mom stayed home to babysit while Adam and I loaded up the car and headed out. You could cut the silence in the car with a knife on the way to the Naval air station, and the world-famous scenery of Deception Pass and the Puget Sound didn’t elicit it’s usual awe.

When we pulled up in the bustling hangar parking lot, we saw goodbyes taking place in front of mini-vans and trucks.

The sailors turned and walked through the gated turnstyle, lugging their seabags and stepping resolutely toward the huge metal structure.

Adam grabbed his stuff out of the car and gave me a big hug. Up to this point, I had been stoic. The emotions hadn’t overtaken me, and I thought I might make it through the drop off without waterworks.

Not so.

As we embraced, I saw him wipe his eyes and try hold back the tears. We’d done several deployments before then, but leaving both me and our newborn daughter took a toll on him.

It was the first time I ever saw him cry.

We said our goodbyes and didn’t drag it out. He headed off to the hangar and I turned the car back home. Glancing back, I burst into tears as I saw him wipe his eyes one more time.

It was official: deployment had begun.

 These 8 Secrets About Navy Wife Life Will Inspire You

Today, as a Navy wife myself, I would like to recognize all the military spouses in all branches. No military spouse’s life is easy. We are some of the strongest women and men I know.

The wonderful milspouses I’ve been blessed to meet have inspired me beyond expectation.

People who have never experienced military life (but watch a lot of TV) view military spouses in a limited way. But there is always more than meets the eye, and today I wanted to share the secrets I have come to know about REAL Navy wife life.

The fact is, they call me dependent…

The truth is I am independent and capable.

I am able to do many things on my own that most people only do with others. I can also do all the household chores, go to work, keep the kids entertained, take care of the dog, clean the kitchen, and still bring my friend a meal after she’s had a baby.

I don’t like to ask for help from others unless I really need it.

If I have kids, they call me a mom…

The truth is, I am Mom and Dad, plumber, window washer, house cleaner, chauffer, student, teacher, home decorator, life coach, homework manager, mechanic, accountant, bill-payer, everything-arranger… before I then collapse on the couch for a 30 minute TV show so I can have some “me time.”

Then I go and do it all the next day.
life as a navy wife

If I don’t have kids, I do most of the above…

Except instead of collapsing for 30 minutes of “me time,” I sit in the evenings alone on the couch wishing American Idol, the Bachelorette, or you-fill-in-the-blank show started this week.

Because how else am I going to pass all these lonely evenings if I have nothing to watch?

Employers call me one of “those” people who leaves a job every year… the kind no one wants to hire.

But the truth is, I am qualified, committed, cheerful, and maybe the best worker you have. It would be great if you would give me a chance. I just might move in 6 months.

They call me strong

But the truth is, I’m also tender, caring, lonely, fearful, proud, and tired.

And I can’t wait for help to come stepping off that plane or across that gangplank into my arms.

I cry in the shower at first, but then my sorrow hides underneath the “get ‘er done” attitude. I still feel it but I can get through.

I get scared at night if the dog barks. I get choked up at every homecoming video and military ad. Ok, I get choked up at like every ad. But maybe that’s because I just had a baby. Or my fourth baby.

They call me strong. But I’m on my knees every night, praying to the One who holds them in His hands to please keep him safe.

life as a navy wife

They call me a friend

But the truth is, my friends are more like family.

They’re there for me when I’m on bed rest. They bring me meals when I’m sick or I’ve had a baby. They plan activities for us to do to pass the time.

We share our highs and our lows. We laugh and we cry together. We walk dogs and watch kids. We serve on boards and committees and as ombudsman to help each other make it. We go out for wine and appetizers. We sit on each other’s couches.

We do life.

They say, “Home is Where the Heart Is…”

But if that’s true, home is on the other side of the world, because that’s where my heart is…. In the desert, in the pacific, in Europe, on the other side of the US in training, on the other side of my iPhone screen.

I can never quite get to it, no matter how hard I try.

I do my best to make my house a home for the family and me. My kids will know this as home. But they will know someone is missing if they are old enough to understand.

And I will give everything to make life as fun as I can for them. And I will do everything I can to help them get to know the one who is missing.

life as a navy wife

They call it “touching and moving” when our loved ones come home

But we call it gut-wrenching, tangible joy you can taste.

It’s the jitters that keep you up all night the night before. It’s sweating through your outfit out of nerves and excitement. It’s standing for hours in the heat as you watch the ship pull in, straining for a glimpse of your sailor at the rails.

It’s watching spouse and kid after kid run from the hangar into the arms of their aviator… while you wait not so calmly for yours to get off the stinkin’ plane!

It’s life as a Navy wife. We’re just like everyone else, and we’re a breed all our own. They call us dependent… but we are so much more.


PS. To see our homecoming pictures from the deployment I mentioned at the beginning, go here.
life as a navy wife

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Sherry Redmon August 15, 2015 at 2:04 pm

Dear Navy wife, thanks so much for sharing your heart & soul and quite well too! I have a Navy wife grand daughter in VA Beach and she has her struggles too with two babies, a toddler & newly born baby too! She is very active and she does a good job with everything, she does. I am so amazed at how proud she is of her husband and his job, he does! I am too! I also have a Marine grandson with a family that live out in 29 palms, they have a new baby also! With all my grand daughter-in-law has to do with her busy family. Both of them are terrific about keeping us posted of all that is going on in their busy lives! My oldest son is a retired Army Major and for many years they were stationed all over the world. Germany being their first appointment. My daughter-in-law was in the service also, but found she just could not handle all the stress of caring for the babies as they came and trying to get care for them. She had to give up and leave the service. It was just too much and I sure understand that. It has worked out great for them and they reap some good benefits of her having served quite a while “hanging in there”. I am so proud of all my military family. My own husband served our country in the Army just after the Korean Conflict! His mother would not sign for him to go during that time. I am thankful for that and he put his time in and came back home! Having served all his time overseas and has a wealth of wonderful stories we all love hearing about his days in the service! It is a honorable way to work and serve too! God bless you and all military families that serve our country so honorably! Mrs. Sherry Redmon


2 Heather August 20, 2015 at 2:50 pm

Thank you Mrs. Redmon. That is quite a legacy of military service! Thanks for all you do to support your military family members, and thanks for reading my blog! ~Heather


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