Lessons I’ve Learned As A Military Spouse

by Heather on December 10, 2012

Military Spouse

Lessons I’ve Learned As A Military Spouse

by Heather Goffrier

We had a fabulous time over the weekend at my husband’s squadron Christmas Party. It was so fun to see everyone all dressed up and get caught up. I was reflecting on why it was such a good time. I realized I’ve learned a few things as a military spouse so I thought I’d share them with you.


1- Military Spouses Don’t Have A Rank

This was one of the first things my hubby told me when we got married. He’s seen way too many times when officer’s wives thought they had their husband’s rank and were lording it over people. That’s no fun for anyone.

Now there are times when a spouse has a role such as COW (Commanding Officer’s Wife) or a position on the board or something. But there’s a big difference between a role and acting superior or being on a power trip! This is one thing I’m striving to always remember as my husband’s career progresses.

Thankfully I haven’t run into too many people like that in the three years we’ve been married. Our spouses club here is great and I think that’s part of what made the Christmas party so fun. All the ladies are super nice and enjoy each other. I’m so bummed I forgot to take a picture! If I can find one we’re in I’ll try to post on Facebook.


2- Gossip Hurts And People Are Cool

As I said, for the most part our spouses club is amazing. However there are always a few issues at times. It is so easy to talk about other people and complain about things they do. I try to avoid this and I think it’s really hurtful overall, even though it can feel good at the time.

One thing I’ve learned in life, even before being around the military, is that most people are pretty nice if you give them a chance. I’ve met people and my first impression wasn’t good. I thought for sure I didn’t like them or that they were rude. But if I gave them the benefit of the doubt, often I learned that they were really cool. Sometimes I even became good friends with them.

People have different personalities and if we can learn to give grace to others and not get angry or talk behind their back, everything will go a lot more smoothly!


3- Enjoy The Time When Your Spouse Is Home

Another thing that made this weekend’s event so fun was just the fact that our spouses are home for the holidays! Last Christmas, our squadron was deployed. There is nothing that puts a damper on the holidays more than being away from your loved ones.

This year I am just enjoying every second and being thankful that he’s here. Deployments are tough and when they have to miss big events or holidays, it’s hard. But on the flip side, it makes the times he’s here that much more special. I am trying not to take any of it for granted!

So those are a few things I’ve learned that I’ve been reflecting on. I hope in this holiday season that you can have fun and enjoy those around you. If you are not with your loved ones this year, my heart goes out to you and I encourage you to hang in there!




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