14 Ways Becoming A Mom Changed Deployment

by Heather on November 16, 2015

"14 Ways Becoming A Mom Changed Deployment" by Heather of Happyfitnavywife.com | Boy these are true! Love mommylife and military life, even though they're challenging.

I always want to know the future, but (surprise) I never do. Unfortunately I’m not Marty McFly and I don’t have a super awesome DeLorean to take me forward into my future. When I enter into a new situation, my expectations are often turned upside down, causing bumps and bruises as I adjust to the reality.

Before we had kids, I always thought of a deployment with kids as this looming, black cloud that I’d have to walk under someday. Like deployment with a kid was this impossible task that I would have to tackle, with no one to help me and I would probably go crazy.

Now that I’ve been through a deployment with our daughter, I have a new perspective on it. Even though there were times I did, in fact, think I would go crazy… I was pleasantly surprised by many other experiences during the months apart from daddy.

So today I give you…

14 Ways Becoming A Mom Changed Deployment

1- It made it 1 billion times harder to say goodbye. It was the first time I ever saw my husband cry. Ever.

2- It made the time go by faster because I was so busy. I never knew that raising a child took so much time an energy. Well, maybe I knew in my head, but until I experienced it, I didn’t really know. Time really seemed to fly at times during that deployment because I had much less free time to spend missing hubby.

3- Finding a time to talk became more difficult, as I was nursing or exhausted at times when he was available.

4- I was rarely ever bored. A new baby is a wonder. Watching her sleep, eat, coo, wiggle… it was all amazing. And, I spent a lot of time with family as a result of her being in the world, so that helped with the boredom factor.

5- I grew close with other mom friends. There is definitely a deep understanding between moms, about parenting and all the life changes brought on by a new child. I felt like I entered the “sisterhood.”

6- I took a million pictures. My camera roll had never contained more photos!

7- I saw a lot more of our family and relied on them more for support. I used to think, “I’d never go home for a long time during deployment. I’m much too independent.” Well, that thinking changed. Immediately. And I spent a good month or two at my parent’s house through the time apart.

8- In some ways I was less lonely. I had a buddy 24/7 to keep me company.

9- In a lot of ways, I missed hubby more. He was missing so much, and every new milestone brought a new reminder that he was gone.

10- I grew more independent in a new way. It’s amazing what you learn about yourself in the middle of the night, going on no sleep and dealing with a screaming kid. I found that at my wits end, I actually had more wits to work with than I had thought. =)

11- I had to work harder to attend activities. Being social definitely became more of a challenge and I had to be very intentional about it.  Finding a babysitter, leaving early, not attending, and finding new outlets for activities all became part of life for me.

12- I asked a lot more advice on Facebook and Google. Thank goodness for smart phones that can spew information on “how to get a baby to sleep?” or “what does green poo mean?” Lifesaver.

13- I spent time with the in-laws without hubby. Now that we had a child, there was much more reason to spend time with the in-laws. I really enjoy hubby’s family, but we hadn’t spent too much time together in our previous deployments. This time, we made plans to meet up more frequently.

14- The focus of deployment shifted to include helping someone else through deployment. “How can I keep her connected to Daddy?” and “How can I make sure she recognizes his voice and knows he loves her?” became new questions to answer.

What’s something in your life that has changed deployments for you?

xoxo,
Heather

becoming a mom

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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Julie November 16, 2015 at 10:11 am

This was great to read! I only have ever done deployments with kids but yes they do keep you busy and allow you to not get bored. I can totally see that.

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2 Heather November 19, 2015 at 2:33 pm

Thanks Julie, for stopping by and for sharing!

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3 Stacey Currie February 2, 2016 at 8:53 am

Thank you so much for sharing this. This is all so much true! I went through one deployment without kids and now we have daughter this go around. I can’t relate to the family related ones because I stay here and family is pretty far away, but every other one is so so true and I 100% relate. I am so glad that someone other than me thinks this way or feels this way.

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4 Heather February 8, 2016 at 8:25 pm

Thanks Stacey! I’m so glad you can relate! I hope you have a good time with your daughter during deployment and can make some special memories! =)

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